Well kids, it's Election Day, time to get off the couch and put in your two cents for who should be in charge around here. Somebody's going to running the country anyway, so you might as well contribute to the general decision-making process. It is literally the least you can do.

I'll make this brief.

I don't know enough about the issues to make an informed choice, therefore I will not vote.

This is the age of the internet, folks. Informing yourself is a simple task. Take the half-hour. And you don't have to vote for every contest. I don't know what a comptroller is either.

I see no difference between the two presidential candidates, therefore I will not vote.

Leaving aside the fact that I definitely believe there are differences between the candidates, the presidential election has ramifications in the legislature as well. Electing Mitt Romney will reaffirm to Republicans in the House and Senate that everyone had a collective hallucination in 2008, and the far right will be even more brazen in their actions. Reelecting the President will hand political capital to the Democratic Senators, who may then be able to do things. And as always, there is the question of judicial nominations: Ruth Bader-Ginsberg is old. Really, really old. The president elected tomorrow will have at least one seat to fill in the next four years.

I will not be affected by any of the potential policy changes, therefore I will not vote.

Doubtful, but somebody will. Voting is important not just because we want to make our own tiny little voices heard, just a bit, but because there's 300 million of us. It's bigger than you.

I should shut up now. I'm distracting you from voting.

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So, what do you think?