Con­grat­u­la­tions! March 10th is Inter­na­tion­al Day of Awe­some­ness, and if you’re read­ing this, then you’ve already tak­en a step in the right direc­tion in your right­eous attempt to achieve total awe­some­ness.

Who-is-awesome

So, you seek the path to enlight­en­ment through total awe­some­ness? Please, allow me to show you the way. On the first step in achiev­ing total awe­some­ness we must ask, what is awe­some? Answer, almost every­thing. Is ice cream awe­some? Yes. Is piz­za awe­some? Yes. Is piz­za and ice cream togeth­er awe­some? Yes. Is bloody stool awe­some? No. Also, you should see a doc­tor imme­di­ate­ly, but don’t pan­ic because doc­tors, con­trary to pop­u­lar belief, are awe­some.

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No, not THE doc­tor. Although still awe­some, I was think­ing more…

Smiling medical woman doctor.. Thumb up

There. That’s bet­ter. Now that we have an awe­some clean bill of health, we’re on to step two, which relies heav­i­ly on the imag­i­na­tion as we are going to take one awe­some thing, and com­bine it with anoth­er, to form a super mega explo­sion of awe­some (Yes, explo­sions are cool, made cool­er by walk­ing away from them with­out look­ing back). So, for exam­ple, bears are cool. Sharks are also cool. You know what’s cool­er than a bear or a shark?

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BEAR-SHARK! BOOM!

And it doesn’t end there! May­be a bear-shark just isn’t doing it for you, but we’ve already estab­lished both bears and sharks are awe­some.

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BEAR RIDING A SHARK SMOKING A CIGAR WITH A MACHINE GUNBOOM!

But you know what would be cool­er than a bear?

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WIZARD, RIDING A DINOSAUR, RIDING A SHARK WITH A CANNON ON IT’S HEAD!

If I had a mic, this is where I would drop it. Can we pos­si­bly get more awe­some than this? No. But that’s okay, because step three is not about cre­at­ing awe­some­ness, but shar­ing it. Because with­out shar­ing the awe­some, with­out the love and pas­sion of awe­some things, then we would have no Inter­na­tion­al Day of Awe­some­ness. And that my friend. is not awe­some. So share, and dance, and sing, and draw, and love, and dance some more! For you are alive, spin­ning at 1,040mph on a giant blue orb in vast and beau­ti­ful vac­u­um of space, breath­ing the same shared mol­e­cules of dinosaurs, Cae­sar, da Vin­ci, Shake­speare, Ein­stein, and George Clooney. I am you as you are me and we are all togeth­er. I am the wal­rus. I am the egg-man. I, it, she, he, them, those, and that are all awe­some! When in doubt, remem­ber, every­thing is awe­some! (Except your bloody stool)

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So, what do you think?