Mmmmmmmmm, piñassssssssss.

The pineappleyest, coconuttiest, deliciousest day of the year!

I went to Key West for the first time this past January, and let me tell you, it was amazing.  There were lots of things about it that I loved, but one of the biggest was all the piña coladas I drank.  And they were a legion.  So much rum, you guys.  So much.  I loved them so much that I came home from my wedding trip to Key West and almost immediately bought an awesome Ninja blender so I could make them myself at home.  One of the best purchases I have made.

I need to go to there.

The piña colada was invented in Puerto Rico at the Caribe Hilton Hotel's Beachcomber Bar in San Juan in 1954.  It has been giving us all glorious, tropical, rum-filled brain freeze ever since.  In 1978 it was named the national drink of Puerto Rico.  All of which basically makes me want to move there.

Now.  Many people, who like to think of themselves as aficionados of alcohol consumption, tend to find the piña colada overly sweet.  These people are, if you'll pardon the expression, nincompoops.  First of all, pineapple juice is literally the King of Fruit Juices.  It is patently delectable.  If I could live on pineapple juice alone, I might.  Perhaps only augmenting my diet with cream of coconut, ice, and rum.  Maybe a maraschino cherry every now and then. If you know what I mean.

Secondly, cream of coconut is amazing.  Speaking as someone who is not particularly fond of coconut, cream of coconut is really one of the most delightful substances in the world.  It has all the wonderful, tropical goodness of coconut without the weird textural nightmare that is shredded coconut.

Finally, there's the rum.  Ah, rum.  You may like your margaritas.  You may like your cosmopolitans.  But tequila and vodka are to rum as your high school tennis coach is to Serena Williams.  Rum is one of the best spirits out there.  It's versatile, being delicious on its own and mixed into drinks.  It can have all the beautiful flavor complexity of good whisky and usually has very little of the accompanying bite.  It's liquor for people smart enough to realize that you don't have to pretend to like something that tastes like dirt (looking your way, tequila) in order to be cool.  Plus, it's the drink of pirates.  And, be honest with yourself, you want to be a pirate.

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas.

 

Basically, what I'm saying is that this July 10th, go out and get yourself a piña colada.  Or, better yet, make yourself some at home.  If you have a blender, you're pretty much all set.  Buy some good rum, some pineapple juice, cream of coconut, make sure your ice trays are full, and go to town!  My preferred recipe is equal parts white rum and pineapple juice, about half again as much cream of coconut, ice to fill my blender, and blend until smooth! Don't be afraid to let your blender go for a while.  Mine has a "frozen drink" setting (not to brag), and it definitely takes a minute or two.  It blends it up good.  Pour into a tall glass, finish with a dark rum floater and a couple maraschinos (if you want them).  Enjoy!

By    No Comments

So, what do you think?