Just like this.

Just like this.

Oh man, April.  You are so cute!  April is like, the cutest mon­th, you guys.  Because it’s all, like, try­ing to be so spring-y and ver­dant and flow­er­ful, but it’s most­ly just a ton of rain forever and ever.  Like, I just imag­ine April stand­ing some­where, drip­ping wet, like, “hey guys! What’s up?”  So cute.  ANY­way and as usu­al, there’s a ton of fun hap­pen­ing at KU this mon­th, so click READ MORE to find out what’s on our agen­da!

Look at all that deliciousness

Look at all that deli­cious­ness

April is Alco­hol Aware­ness Mon­th!  Now.  We are pret­ty aware of alco­hol here.  Hyper-aware, one might even say.  But for you non-KU-ers who need a spe­cial mon­th for booze aware­ness, this is it!  (Pre­sum­ably the founders of this mon­th actu­al­ly meant, like, alco­hol abuse aware­ness mon­th, or some­thing, so, you know.  Be respon­si­ble or what­ev­er.)

Sand­wich­es are a con­tro­ver­sial sub­ject.  Peo­ple have a ton of opin­ions about which sand­wich­es are best,  which times are most appro­pri­ate for sand­wich­es,  what kinds of foods accom­pa­ny sand­wich­es well, and pret­ty much every oth­er sand­wich-relat­ed sub­ject.  April, or Grilled Cheese Mon­th is the per­fect time to express some of mine!  There are not a lot of things bet­ter than a per­fect­ly toast­ed, but­tery grilled cheese on rye.  Many peo­ple like the GC and toma­to soup com­bo, but I don’t real­ly do that.  Just give me a dill pick­le spear and a side of fries and I’m good to go.

April is also Nation­al Knuck­les Down Mon­th!  Which is a mar­bles thing.  Did you know that West­ern PA is actu­al­ly kind of a pow­er­house when it comes to mar­bles com­pe­ti­tions?  Super weird, right?

Final­ly, April is STDs Mon­th.  Which, ok, not real­ly some­thing cool or cel­e­bra­to­ry.  BUT!  The­se are things to be care­ful of.  And some peo­ple need a mon­th as a reminder, I guess.

Impor­tant Dates in April!

GRILLED PB&J?!  Game changer.

GRILLED PB&J?! Game chang­er.

1–7 — Laugh at Work Week:  Get the lolz in, man.  Work, for most adult humans, takes up a huge chunk of the wak­ing hours.  If you can’t laugh there, that’s prob­a­bly not a good thing!

1 — April Fool’s Day:  They actu­al­ly moved April Fool’s Day to May this year.  OH!  April Fool!  Haha­ha, so fun­ny.

2 — Nation­al Peanut But­ter and Jel­ly Day:  Anoth­er great sand­wich!  Not the deli­cious melty amaz­ing­ness that is grilled cheese, but still a wor­thy effort if prop­er­ly exe­cut­ed.  Plus, it’s an ele­men­tary school sta­ple and who doesn’t have nos­tal­gia for that?

4–12 — Nation­al Robot­ics Week:  Far be it from me to dis­cour­age human pro­gress.  And I under­stand that robot­ics is an impor­tant area of study and advance­ment.  But seri­ous­ly.  Have you guys not seen the Age of Ultron trail­er?  This is our future, peo­ple!

Send a card this NBE!

Send a card this NBE!

4 — Inter­na­tion­al Pil­low Fight Day:  Man, a good pil­low is actu­al­ly a pret­ty sweet hand to hand com­bat weapon.  I want to see some­one on, like, The Walk­ing Dead just sur­viv­ing the zom­bie apoc­a­lypse with noth­ing but a heavy duty can­vas pil­low.  That would be so cool.  Get on it, AMC!

5 — East­er:  Arguably (but not real­ly, I guess) the most impor­tant cel­e­bra­tion on the Chris­tian cal­en­dar, Easter’s roots as a cel­e­bra­tion of renewal and Spring reach fur­ther back than A.D. 33, and whether you cel­e­brate the Res­ur­rec­tion or not, I hope we can all agree that Spring is pret­ty great.

6 — New Beer’s Eve:  So remem­ber back in the day when they banned alco­hol?  Yeah, that was dumb.  But when they came to their sens­es and un-banned it, peo­ple appar­ent­ly, like, wait­ed out­side bars until mid­night and it was just like NYE!  A new year’s eve for booze!  New Beer’s Eve!  So clev­er, right?

10–11 — Nation­al Pie Cham­pi­onships:  There real­ly aren’t enough good things in the world to say about pie.  Pie cham­pi­onships are the smartest thing in the world.  Does the phrase best of the best mean any­thing to you?

11 — Bar­ber­shop Quar­tet Day:  Ok, not as good as pie, but still pret­ty great.

Awww, three of these characters are dead.  RIP.

Awww, three of the­se char­ac­ters are dead. RIP.

12–18 — Nation­al Library Week:  Libraries are the lit­er­ary equiv­a­lent of a pie bak­ery.  A pie-ery, if you will.  So Library Week is pret­ty impor­tant, you guys.

12 — Drop Every­thing and Read Day AND Sea­son Pre­miere of Game of Thrones(!):  Best day of the year.  Espe­cial­ly if you actu­al­ly com­mit to cel­e­brat­ing it.  Seri­ous­ly, grab a book.  They’re the best thing.  Then at night it’s time to watch GAME OF THRONES OMG YOU GUYS I’M SO EXCITED!!!!!!

13 — Scrab­ble Day:  Aw, Scrab­ble.  You scamp.  I tried to get back into Words with Friends again.  Failed again.  I just can’t stay inter­est­ed in it!  So frus­trat­ing!

16–22 — Inter­na­tion­al Whistlers’ Week:  If you’ve nev­er wit­nessed the KU whistling orches­tra, I’m sor­ry that your life is so emp­ty.  We are real­ly great at whistling.

Still beautiful, though.

Still beau­ti­ful, though.

16 — Nation­al Wear Your Paja­mas to Work Day AND Nation­al High Five Day AND Sup­port Teen Lit­er­a­ture Day:  Oof.  Big­gie.  But hey, at least you can relax in your pjs while you’re high fiv­ing YA authors.

19–25 — Admin­is­tra­tive Pro­fes­sion­als Week AND Nation­al Karaoke Week:  Admin­is­tra­tion makes the world go ’round, you guys.  Be nice.  Relat­ed, go sing some karaoke!  It’s so fun!

20 — 4/20:  Dude.  Just buy your­self a Weed Mon­ey coin purse and get it over with.

22 — Admin­is­tra­tive Pro­fes­sion­als Day AND Earth Day:  See Admin­is­tra­tive Pro­fes­sion­als Week entry.  Also love the Earth!  You have to live on it for the rest of your life!

23 — Talk Like Shake­speare Day:  So the 23rd is Shakespeare’s birth­day (and also death­day?  I feel like there’s a lot of controversy/confusion about this?) and the most fun way to cel­e­brate it is by adding “eth” to your verbs and say­ing things like “Zounds!” and “For­sooth!”  Seri­ous­ly, try it!

24 — Arbor Day:  I saw an info­graph­ic just the oth­er day that showed how much vir­gin forest has dis­ap­peared from the US since the 18th cen­tu­ry.  It was depress­ing as hell.  There’s a sil­ver lin­ing, though!  Appar­ent­ly John Muir and all his tree-hug­ging philo­soph­i­cal descen­dants have got­ten through to peo­ple, because there are actu­al­ly more trees grow­ing in the US now than there were 100 years ago.  Go Sier­ra Club!

26 — KU Book Club Meet­ing:  In hon­or of the recent pass­ing of one of the great writ­ers of our time, Ter­ry Pratch­ett, we’re read­ing the first book in his Dis­c­world series, The Colour of Mag­ic!  Pratch­ett described the book as his attempt to do for clas­si­cal fan­ta­sy what Blaz­ing Sad­dles had done for West­erns, so get excit­ed!  The meet­ing will be held at 6 p.m. at the store!  See you there!

27 — Morse Code Day:  Break out your ancient toy walkie-talkies so you can inter­pret those dits and dahs!

30 — Walpur­gis Night:  Yet anoth­er fun Spring fes­ti­val with bon­fires and stuff as well as an intense­ly hilar­i­ous name!  Can’t beat that with a stick!  The name comes from an abbess and Saint named Walpur­ga (thanks, mom.)  Since her feast is cel­e­brat­ed on May Day, the night of April 30th is the eve of her feast day, i.e., Walpurga’s Night or, Walpur­gis­nacht.  The more you know!

Dear Pink Apron Confections,  Yes, please.  Love, Adam

Dear Pink Apron Con­fec­tions, Yes, please. Love, Adam

April Birth­days!

1 — Anne McCaf­frey AND Fred and George Weasley AND Bart Simp­son

2 — Hans Chris­tian Ander­son

4 — Robert Downey, Jr.

6 — Paul Rudd

8 — Miss Chanan­dler Bong

15 — Emma Wat­son AND Hen­ry James AND Leonar­do da Vin­ci

22 — Vladimir Nabokov

23 — William Shake­speare

25 — Hank Azaria

27 — Eey­ore

28 — Ter­ry Pratch­ett ( :( RIP) AND Harper Lee

29 — Jer­ry Sein­feld

30 — Lis­beth Salan­der

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So, what do you think?