June is one of those months that people just look forward to all year. It's sunny and I have my BBQ BLAZIN' pretty much every day. The holidays for June reflect this laid-back enthusiasm.

Firstly, June is National Iced Tea Month, and I wonder why? Nothing cools you off faster on a hot day than a tall glass of iced tea. The taller the better, that's what I always say. Here at KU we drink Manute Bol-sized glasses of iced tea by the dozen all summer long, but we go especially nuts during June, because you know...holiday. I suggest you do the same. We have crazy amounts of delicious tea here at Kards Unlimited, so stop in a let us get you outfitted for some iced tea adventures!

June 1st-2nd: Heimlich Maneuver Day!

This is a day to celebrate the Heimlich Maneuver. If you haven't received the extensive emergency medical training that I have, the gist is when someone is choking you maneuver behind them, get a good grip, and thrust furiously.

The good stuff

June 2nd: Pencil Day!

I used to be a big pen user. I almost never used pencils, but I have seen the light. Pencils are freakin' awesome. If you are a pen user you should give pencils a shot today. Make sure you are using a premium pencil, though. Those half-plastic, cheap, crappy pencils just don't cut it. I suggest a Dixon Ticonderoga...or any Dixon pencil, really. I prefer a hexagonal, cedar, yellow body, with a HB #2 lead, and I use a long-point pencil sharpener. Seriously...try it. You well never go back to the dark side. Plus, nobody can make you join the "Pen15" club. "Pencil15" just doesn't have the same "zing" for those jokers.

June 7th-10th: Superman Week!

Up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! No, idiot, it's Superman Week. Who doesn't love Superman? Well, besides villains and evil-doers... At Kards Unlimited we think he's, you know...super. If you want to read another hilarious article by someone with too much time on their hands, check out this article about what would happen if Superman actually slept with Lois Lane.

June 15th: National Flip-Flop Day!

I refuse to celebrate this holiday, because flip-flops are lazy. The only good use for a flip-flop is avoiding athlete's foot in the dorm shower, and even then I would rather just deal with the athlete's foot, or wear regular shoes in the shower. But we should be seeing lots of action from Mitt Romney on this day. Get it? Flip-flop? OOOOO Timely-political-joke burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrned!

June 16th: Bloomsday!

The snootiest holiday of the year! Also known as "I Am Better Than You Day". This is a holiday where people talk about a book that they haven't read, James Joyce's Ulysses, which is set on June 16th.

June 17th: Fathers' Day!

Finally! A real holiday! Compared to Mothers' Day, Fathers' Day is a breeze. Find a funny card, maybe one that talks about "farts", get some hilarious gifts about drinking, and you're done! Dad's are easy that way.

Nobody knew who they were, or what they were doing.

June 20th: Summer Solstice!

This is the longest day of the year, at least for us here in the north (Winter is Coming). We celebrate by doing nothing. Unless you are a druid, in which case it's the greatest holiday of the year! Also, congratulations on the whole druid thing.

June 21st: Go Skateboarding Day!

For those who skate, this holiday is pretty self-explanatory. For those who don't, use this holiday as a chance to say "radical" and pretend you are awesome enough to actually go skateboarding. I will be doing the latter.

June 22nd: Take Your Dog to Work Day!

Most dogs are pretty lazy. Many dogs are incredibly hard-working, but there are few enough of these that we call them "working dogs". My dog hasn't worked a day in his life. I would bring him to work, but if my dog "did his business" here my boss would get a frowny face.

June 24th: International Fairy Day!

Anyone who thinks fairies aren't awesome just isn't paying attention. They are like tiny, sexy, magical bugs! There is such a large variety to choose from! Also there is the added bonus that they are TOTALLY REAL and I want to live on a mushroom with one.

 

June Birthdays:

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