A cool breeze on your bare upper thighs, the tingling sensation of freedom, the hard stare of a stranger’s eye, it must be No Pants Day! May 3rd is National No Pants Day, or if you’re anything like me, it’s the weekend and everyday after 7:00 pm.
My crest. My creed.
I am a firm believer that pants are overrated. Unfortunately, society does not share these beliefs. Luckily, there are enough of my non-trouser wearing brethren that we’ve managed to take giant step forward with No Pants Day, to rid the world of the pants menace. I’ve been giving the term “fire-crotch” a whole new meaning since 1999.
Hail Me, Destroyer of Pants!
The entire point of No Pants Day is to wear a normal outfit, simply without pants, as if the participant simply forgot to put them on, and to look ridiculous in the process. Promoters state that the holiday is about not taking oneself seriously. The holiday is an example of surreal humor, which relies on an absurd situation (in this case, crowds of people walking around wearing no pants). What’s not to love?
Nothing to see here…
or… no, wait, that is something to see…
Unbuckle that belt, loosen the string, zip down that fly, unbutton the button, do a bum shake, and let those pants fall to the floor.
Show off the goods. And remember, when in doubt…