1 Jul
2015

Dr. Henry Walton “Indiana” Jones Jr.

July 1st. You may know it as a typ­i­cal summer day, or maybe as a lead up to the fourth of July? Well you’d be right and so very wrong on both accounts. July 1st is a day we should all cel­e­brate in supreme thank­ful­ness, because it’s the day that the man who kept the arc of the covenant out of the hands of the Nazis, stopped a dark evil from spread­ing over India, found the holy grail  and res­cued us from the …aliens… no, no sorry that last one didn’t hap­pen. Any­way, this guy was born. Of course I’m speaking of none other than the greatest  screen hero of all time, Doctor Henry Wal­ton “Indi­ana” Jones Junior.

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Indi­ana was the name of his dog. 

The Indi­ana Jones tril­ogy (Yes, tril­ogy. There was never a fourth movie made and it was all just a ter­ri­ble dream every­one shared simul­ta­ne­ously) is the sin­gle great­est action/adventure fran­chise ever cre­ated. It also con­vinced me I could wield a whip and out run boul­ders. Dis­claimer:  These are NOT things You can do.

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Dis­claimer #2: You also will NOT look cool in a fedora.

From the cool fedora, to the sweet leather jacket, to the man satchel, Indy has it all. Style, grace, fight moves, and big brown eyes. Indy is a man’s man. And he’ adopted small Asian kids before it was cool.

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But what­ever hap­pened to Short Round?

Okay, I’m break­ing down, I can’t do it any­more. As much as I want to pre­tend King­dom of the Crys­tal Skull never hap­pened, it did. We all saw it, we all cried. I know grief is hard, but together we move past it, get on with our lives, and love the Indy we used to know. But seri­ously, stay away from the Blu-Ray of Crys­tal Skull, I’ve heard rumors that if you watch it with your eyes open, well.…

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There might be side-effects. 

I’ll leave you with this, to help make what I’m sure is a bor­ing Mon­day into an adven­ture. Seri­ously, play it while com­plet­ing any task and tell me you don’t feel just a lit­tle bit more like a hero. Chang­ing the cof­fee. Chang­ing the sta­pler. Chang­ing the Dia­per. All now more heroic.

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30 Jun
2015

July 2015 Calendar of Events

Oh, July, you are the delicious epitome of summer. Hot days, hot dogs, corn on the cob, air conditioning, ice cream, french fries, Independence Day... July makes me nostalgic for those sticky ice pops with the plastic that will cut your lip, the pool, and sunshine. Mmm. Click through to see all of our wonderful reasons to celebrate this month!

July 2015 Events

"I drifted into a summer-nap under the hot shade of July, serenaded by a cicadae lullaby, to drowsy-warm dreams of distant thunder." Terri Guillemets

Read more >>

24 Jun
2015

International Fairy Day 2015

Get your glitter! Get your flower crowns! It's FAIRY DAY!

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On this day, once every year, people young and old are encouraged to really believe in magic again! Tell stories of pixies and faeries and banshees and pooka.

real2faerieImagine that the whole world is filled with a magic that streams like glitter and sunshine. The flowers bloom because the summer faeries open them for us, and the stars twinkle because they're being tickled by pixies.

We heartily suggest that you take full advantage of this holiday. What Real1faeriebetter excuse do you have for wearing a tutu and crown in to work? And don't forget your wings. Also, a thing that everyone around you will love and appreciate is if you flit around and throw glitter everywhere. ...wait. no. don't do that one.

Happy Fairy Day everyone!

Here. Have a link to DIY fairy wings! Also DIY tutu! Please send us pictures!

22 Jun
2015

Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Eric Carle

When I say 'Eric Carle' you probably think instantly of The Very Hungry Caterpillar. What you probably don't know about Mr. Carle is that he had a cray cray life before he started writing and illustrating children's literature.  He was born in America in 1929 but his family moved back to Germany when he was 6, and he graduated from the local art school there. When he was 15, the German government drafted him to help dig the Siegfried Line. He saw some horrible shit doing that, he would say later that his wife thought he had PTSD from it, and he didn't like to talk about it. Go figure.

Since he was born an American, he was always eager to get back to the states. He came back over with $40 when he was 23. He started working at The New York Times as a graphic designer. Then he got drafted into the US Army during the Korean War, stationed in Germany (WTF REALLY?!) as a mail clerk. He went back to The New York Times after that, and then went on to be an art director at an advertising agency.

It wasn't until the age of 38 that he started doing his forreal thang. He collaborated with Bill Martin. Jr. on a book called Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See? From there it was ENTIRELY DOWNHILL! He wrote over 70 books. SEVENTY! The book that stands out from my childhood is The Grouchy Ladybug, because well, children with an at-ee-tood can relate.

LOOK AT THEM ALL!

SO MANY.

SO MANY.

Now that you've been schooled on Eric Carle, I suggest you get to buying all of these books for every child you know because OH MY HEAVENS are they perfect. Adorable, meaningful, and have I freaking mentioned adorable? Happy birthday, Eric Carle!

21 Jun
2015

Grey has arrived…what are you doing tonight?

We at Kards Unlimited have received the much anticipated and highly controversial Grey by E.L. James.  If you aren't familiar with Grey yet, it is 50 Shades of Grey told by Christian Grey. Learn about Christian's traumatic childhood which haunts him every single night.  Come on by and pick up your copy to see what all the fuss is about.

Oh yeah...he knows what all the fuss is about.

Oh yeah...he knows what all the fuss is about.

If you are looking to spend a night in with your honey, we have great products for adventurous lovers.  Whether you want to feel sexy, romantic, fun, or sassy, we have the product for you. My personal favorites are the Kama Sutra massage candles.  Light the wick and relax for twenty minutes, blow the wick out, let it sit for a few minutes, then begin giving your lover a massage they won't forget.

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Scents include: tropical plumeria, Mediterranean almond, coconut pineapple, island passion fruit, and cocoa mint seduction

For a more playful and artistic time, the Lover's Body Paint is a must.  Edible and arousing.  Enjoy a meal of Penis Pasta, or Pasta Boobs, then you can eat dessert directly off someone else's body...yum.   If edible body paint isn't your thing, the glow-in-the-dark finger paint is a fun way to paint the stars on your partner's body.  Play hide-and-seek in the covers...with no clothes on!

And if you are a die hard 50 Shades fan, we carry the Sex Mischief line for all your light bondage needs.  We can even sell you a sex contract!

Sex Mischief product

Sexy Stuff for Sexy Customers!!!  

If you need some inspiration, the Fetish Play dice and our Kama Sutra books will help you get through the night, or the day.

So if you want to try something new in the bedroom this week, we can help!  We love to help!

20 Jun
2015

Summer Solstice

Things are heating up as we prepare to celebrate the 2015 Summer Solstice!

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This year, the summer solstice falls on June 21st. In the Northern Hemisphere, the summer solstice begins at 6:51 a.m. EDT, officially ringing in summer. The date brings the year’s longest stretch of daylight. Though the hours of sunlight depend on location, many areas will see 16 hours’ worth of light!

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For science aficionados, the summer solstice occurs precisely when the Earth's axial tilt is most inclined toward the sun, at the degree of 23° 26', it’s most extreme. In June, the tilt is toward the sun in the Northern Hemisphere, while the second yearly solstice, the winter solstice, in December, the tilt is away from the sun in the Southern Hemisphere.

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The solstice marks the first day of summer, and that means flip-flops, beach trips and barbecues. In southern England, thousands flock to Stonehenge to see the sun rise from the vantage point of the 4,000-year-old solar monument.

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The summer solstice is also a time of celebration for Christians and Pagans. In Christianity, the first day of summer marks the festival of St. John the Baptist, and in Paganism followers celebrate what they call "midsummer" with bonfires and feasts.

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Happy Solstice to all, and to all a good day!

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18 Jun
2015

Take Your Dog to Work Day: June 20!

One of the few things cooler than actually owning a dog is being able to take it places. Ya know, you can't just walk into the grocery store or the pharmacy with your dog. So you have to leave Fido at home while you run errands and go to work and you know that he's secretly mad at you when you do this and then you feel bad but what can you do? Luckily, Shadyside is pretty darn accommodating when it comes to bringing your dog out and about. We are one of the many awesome businesses that has no problem-o with your bringing your dog in with you.

Yogi comes to work!

Yogi comes to work!

Enter Take Your Dog to Work Day. Problem solved! You get to bring your dog with you instead of leaving him home to stare at the wall for the entire day, just so he has as much energy as possible stored up when you get home so he can drive you absolutely nuts with all of his energy. This is the one day of the year where you say, "To hell with that!" and you bring your doggy along. And by the time you get home at the end of the day he is joyously worn out from being *awake* all day. What a strange sensation for the both of you!

I hope you have an enjoyable day at work hanging out with your dog! Happy Take Your Dog to Work Day!

16 Jun
2015

Happy Fudge Day! Except I Didn’t Say, Fudge.’

Oh fudge

Did you know that fudge is "made by mixing sugar, butter, and milk, heating it to the soft-ball stage at 240 °F, and then beating the mixture while it cools so that it acquires a smooth, creamy consistency?" That's not what I would have guessed 'the soft-ball stage' is if you asked me, but hey! You learn something new every day.

This is not particularly relevant, but yes it is. You shut your mouth.

This is not particularly relevant, but yes it is. You shut your mouth. 

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Tangent: when we went to see this movie in the theater, at this part my dad yelled, "Duh!" People loled.

 

Anyway. Fudge is one of those things that you really could not just eat forever and ever. Because it's so flippity-fracking rich. Which is the point of it, so you really can't hold that against it. My favorite fudge is packed with nuts because I am a nut for nuts. Walnuts, almonds, peanuts, pecans... Yes please.

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I'm also fairly certain I can thank Little Debbie for this obsession.

 

Little Debbie

These were my FAVORITE thing to buy with my lunch money. See also: Zebra Cakes. Apparently Little Debbie owned my 10 year old soul.

It's been rumored that individuals have been known to add fruit to fudge, and I for one find that completely repulsive.

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I just threw up in my mouth a little.

 

Why would you go and ruin perfectly good chocolate with fruit? The people that like fruity fudge probably like vanilla ice cream too.

Joan

Judging you.

Back to the real fudge *hair flip*

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Yummm

 

 

Did you know that a person who packages fudge is a fudge packer? Apparently South Park made Tom Cruise a fudge packer in an episode. ...I can see that.

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I will conclude this Fudge Day post with instructions to get yoself so delicious fudge today.