1 Jul
2015

Dr. Henry Walton “Indiana” Jones Jr.

July 1st. You may know it as a typ­i­cal sum­mer day, or maybe as a lead up to the fourth of July? Well you’d be right and so very wrong on both accounts. July 1st is a day we should all cel­e­brate in supreme thank­ful­ness, because it’s the day that the man who kept the arc of the covenant out of the hands of the Nazis, stopped a dark evil from spread­ing over India, found the holy grail  and res­cued us from the …aliens… no, no sorry that last one didn’t hap­pen. Any­way, this guy was born. Of course I’m speak­ing of none other than the great­est  screen hero of all time, Doc­tor Henry Wal­ton “Indi­ana” Jones Junior.

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Indi­ana was the name of his dog. 

The Indi­ana Jones tril­ogy (Yes, tril­ogy. There was never a fourth movie made and it was all just a ter­ri­ble dream every­one shared simul­ta­ne­ously) is the sin­gle great­est action/adventure fran­chise ever cre­ated. It also con­vinced me I could wield a whip and out run boul­ders. Dis­claimer:  These are NOT things You can do.

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Dis­claimer #2: You also will NOT look cool in a fedora.

From the cool fedora, to the sweet leather jacket, to the man satchel, Indy has it all. Style, grace, fight moves, and big brown eyes. Indy is a man’s man. And he’ adopted small Asian kids before it was cool.

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But what­ever hap­pened to Short Round?

Okay, I’m break­ing down, I can’t do it any­more. As much as I want to pre­tend King­dom of the Crys­tal Skull never hap­pened, it did. We all saw it, we all cried. I know grief is hard, but together we move past it, get on with our lives, and love the Indy we used to know. But seri­ously, stay away from the Blu-Ray of Crys­tal Skull, I’ve heard rumors that if you watch it with your eyes open, well.…

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There might be side-effects. 

I’ll leave you with this, to help make what I’m sure is a bor­ing Mon­day into an adven­ture. Seri­ously, play it while com­plet­ing any task and tell me you don’t feel just a lit­tle bit more like a hero. Chang­ing the cof­fee. Chang­ing the sta­pler. Chang­ing the Dia­per. All now more heroic.

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30 Jun
2015

Carry On, Jeeves” wrap up

Thanks to every­one who came out to book club on Sun­day! We had a rip-roaring old time, what?
Just look at all these smil­ing faces!

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The gen­eral opin­ion of all in atten­dance was that every­one should read this book! Why? Well, because it’s hilar­i­ous! and charm­ing! And just gen­eral fun! Quite a few peo­ple at book club had already picked up another Wode­house book to read. And let me tell you, once you’ve got the bug, you’re done for. All the Bertie Wooster is not quite enough Bertie Wooster! 11666160_1456754604624552_7810846338112262679_n

The next book club will be meet­ing on August 16th at 6pm in the store.
We’re switch­ing gears quite dras­ti­cally with this book! On to the creepy tale of ter­ror: The Strain by Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan! If you’ve been aching to get your thrill on, we got you.

See you in August! But also hope­fully before then, because there is PLENTY of time to read a mil­lion other books (and post them for #KUBook­Bingo to win prizes) before the next meeting!!!

 

 

30 Jun
2015

July 2015 Calendar of Events

Oh, July, you are the deli­cious epit­ome of sum­mer. Hot days, hot dogs, corn on the cob, air con­di­tion­ing, ice cream, french fries, Inde­pen­dence Day… July makes me nos­tal­gic for those sticky ice pops with the plas­tic that will cut your lip, the pool, and sun­shine. Mmm. Click through to see all of our won­der­ful rea­sons to cel­e­brate this month!

July 2015 Events

I drifted into a summer-nap under the hot shade of July, ser­e­naded by a cicadae lul­laby, to drowsy-warm dreams of dis­tant thun­der.” Terri Guillemets

Read more »

26 Jun
2015

Cooking With Kards: Ice Cream Edition!

IMG_20150626_094437It’s sum­mer time. And I sure as heck don’t really want to be slav­ing over a hot kitchen right now, at least unless it results in some­thing that will cool me down and chill me out. So I decided that this month I would choose a recipe from the Big Gay Ice Cream book. Yes, that is the title of an actual book. I’m not just call­ing a book big and gay. Although it totally is.

Big Gay Ice Cream is the rec­ol­lec­tions, expla­na­tions, fun tid­bits and gen­er­ally good­ies, com­piled by Bryan Petroff and Dou­glas Quint about their Big Gay Ice Cream busi­ness and how it started. It’s a pretty fun read, or even just a fun skim. It’s set up as if it was a high school year­book, so it’s got lots of fun hand­writ­ten notes in it, some pretty rad pic­tures and, of course, recipes.

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And some sim­ple syrup and some stove time and you’re all done!

I mag­i­cally opened to a recipe so intrigu­ing that I got stuck on the page: Pep­per­coke Sor­bet. The entire ingre­di­ent list is this: Coke (prefer­ably Mex­i­can) and black and pink pep­per­corns. (And sugar. But, duh.)

The thought of mak­ing an ice cream type thing out of pep­per­corns was so weird to me that I needed to give it a shot.  Also, I love Mex­i­can Coke. It’s so much bet­ter than reg­u­lar coke. (*Twirls hip­ster mustache*)

This recipe was wicked easy. The hard­est parts were find­ing an ice cream machine that I could bor­row and stress­ing out about where in the world they sold pink pep­per­corns. Luck­ily I have some pretty amaz­ing (and culi­nary inclined) friends who just had an ice cream machine lying around. (Shout out to Tiffy and fam­ily! Hi Tiffy and fam­ily! Thanks bunches!) And also, Mar­ket Dis­trict appar­ently sells everything.

Like seri­ously, side rail here, but I was just about to resign myself to buy­ing a large con­tainer of ‘rain­bow’ pep­per­corns (includes pink, green and black) and pick­ing out the pink ones. And then I turned around and there was this GIANT glass can­is­ter full of just pink pep­per­corns that you can buy by the ounce. Day made, my friend. Day made.

The result­ing sor­bet? Well, it was a bit wet. I didn’t quite freeze it enough before I tried to use the ice cream maker. But I blame that mostly on me try­ing to make sor­bet in the mid­dle of run­ning around to a few dif­fer­ent appoint­ments. And also not actu­ally know­ing how to sim­mer things. Now I know. YouTube told me. (See guys? Any­one can cook if I can cook.)

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Pep­per­coke Sor­bet with rain­bow fish sprin­kles, cuz why not.

Any­way, it was SUPER yummy. Like really. You know how some­times ice creams can leave a creamy taste in your mouth and you need to chase your ice cream with like a soda or some­thing? Well NO NEED with Pep­per­coke sor­bet! It is super refresh­ing in the mouth. And, don’t worry, it doesn’t taste like you over­dosed on pep­per. It just has a bit of a bite to it. so like a sweet coke sor­bet with a refresh­ing bite. YUM!

You guys should come get this book so you can try these ice creams. Or I guess you could take a road trip to New York and actu­ally get these super rad ice creams from the pro­fes­sion­als at Big Gay Ice Cream.

Oh! Oh! Post Note! There’s a recipe for a sun­dae in the book called Amer­i­can Gobs. Like Amer­i­can Gods. the book. by Neil Gaiman. Whh­haaaaaat. That’s next on my per­sonal check list. Read Amer­i­can Gods while wait­ing for the TV show Amer­i­can Gods while eat­ing an Amer­i­can Gobs Sun­dae. Hecks Yes.

 

24 Jun
2015

International Fairy Day 2015

Get your glit­ter! Get your flower crowns! It’s FAIRY DAY!

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On this day, once every year, peo­ple young and old are encour­aged to really believe in magic again! Tell sto­ries of pix­ies and faeries and ban­shees and pooka.

real2faerieImag­ine that the whole world is filled with a magic that streams like glit­ter and sun­shine. The flow­ers bloom because the sum­mer faeries open them for us, and the stars twin­kle because they’re being tick­led by pixies.

We heartily sug­gest that you take full advan­tage of this hol­i­day. What Real1faeriebet­ter excuse do you have for wear­ing a tutu and crown in to work? And don’t for­get your wings. Also, a thing that every­one around you will love and appre­ci­ate is if you flit around and throw glit­ter every­where. …wait. no. don’t do that one.

Happy Fairy Day everyone!

Here. Have a link to DIY fairy wings! Also DIY tutu! Please send us pictures!

22 Jun
2015

Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Eric Carle

When I say ‘Eric Carle’ you prob­a­bly think instantly of The Very Hun­gry Cater­pil­lar. What you prob­a­bly don’t know about Mr. Carle is that he had a cray cray life before he started writ­ing and illus­trat­ing children’s lit­er­a­ture.  He was born in Amer­ica in 1929 but his fam­ily moved back to Ger­many when he was 6, and he grad­u­ated from the local art school there. When he was 15, the Ger­man gov­ern­ment drafted him to help dig the Siegfried Line. He saw some hor­ri­ble shit doing that, he would say later that his wife thought he had PTSD from it, and he didn’t like to talk about it. Go figure.

Since he was born an Amer­i­can, he was always eager to get back to the states. He came back over with $40 when he was 23. He started work­ing at The New York Times as a graphic designer. Then he got drafted into the US Army dur­ing the Korean War, sta­tioned in Ger­many (WTF REALLY?!) as a mail clerk. He went back to The New York Times after that, and then went on to be an art direc­tor at an adver­tis­ing agency.

It wasn’t until the age of 38 that he started doing his for­real thang. He col­lab­o­rated with Bill Mar­tin. Jr. on a book called Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See? From there it was ENTIRELY DOWNHILL! He wrote over 70 books. SEVENTY! The book that stands out from my child­hood is The Grouchy Lady­bug, because well, chil­dren with an at-ee-tood can relate.

LOOK AT THEM ALL!

SO MANY.

SO MANY.

Now that you’ve been schooled on Eric Carle, I sug­gest you get to buy­ing all of these books for every child you know because OH MY HEAVENS are they per­fect. Adorable, mean­ing­ful, and have I freak­ing men­tioned adorable? Happy birth­day, Eric Carle!

21 Jun
2015

Grey has arrived…what are you doing tonight?

We at Kards Unlim­ited have received the much antic­i­pated and highly con­tro­ver­sial Grey by E.L. James.  If you aren’t famil­iar with Grey yet, it is 50 Shades of Grey told by Chris­t­ian Grey. Learn about Christian’s trau­matic child­hood which haunts him every sin­gle night.  Come on by and pick up your copy to see what all the fuss is about.

Oh yeah...he knows what all the fuss is about.

Oh yeah…he knows what all the fuss is about.

If you are look­ing to spend a night in with your honey, we have great prod­ucts for adven­tur­ous lovers.  Whether you want to feel sexy, roman­tic, fun, or sassy, we have the prod­uct for you. My per­sonal favorites are the Kama Sutra mas­sage can­dles.  Light the wick and relax for twenty min­utes, blow the wick out, let it sit for a few min­utes, then begin giv­ing your lover a mas­sage they won’t forget.

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Scents include: trop­i­cal plume­ria, Mediter­ranean almond, coconut pineap­ple, island pas­sion fruit, and cocoa mint seduction

For a more play­ful and artis­tic time, the Lover’s Body Paint is a must.  Edi­ble and arous­ing.  Enjoy a meal of Penis Pasta, or Pasta Boobs, then you can eat dessert directly off some­one else’s body…yum.   If edi­ble body paint isn’t your thing, the glow-in-the-dark fin­ger paint is a fun way to paint the stars on your partner’s body.  Play hide-and-seek in the covers…with no clothes on!

And if you are a die hard 50 Shades fan, we carry the Sex Mis­chief line for all your light bondage needs.  We can even sell you a sex contract!

Sex Mischief product

Sexy Stuff for Sexy Customers!!!  

If you need some inspi­ra­tion, the Fetish Play dice and our Kama Sutra books will help you get through the night, or the day.

So if you want to try some­thing new in the bed­room this week, we can help!  We love to help!

20 Jun
2015

Summer Solstice

Things are heat­ing up as we pre­pare to cel­e­brate the 2015 Sum­mer Solstice!

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This year, the sum­mer sol­stice falls on June 21st. In the North­ern Hemi­sphere, the sum­mer sol­stice begins at 6:51 a.m. EDT, offi­cially ring­ing in sum­mer. The date brings the year’s longest stretch of day­light. Though the hours of sun­light depend on loca­tion, many areas will see 16 hours’ worth of light!

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For sci­ence afi­ciona­dos, the sum­mer sol­stice occurs pre­cisely when the Earth’s axial tilt is most inclined toward the sun, at the degree of 23° 26′, it’s most extreme. In June, the tilt is toward the sun in the North­ern Hemi­sphere, while the sec­ond yearly sol­stice, the win­ter sol­stice, in Decem­ber, the tilt is away from the sun in the South­ern Hemisphere.

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The sol­stice marks the first day of sum­mer, and that means flip-flops, beach trips and bar­be­cues. In south­ern Eng­land, thou­sands flock to Stone­henge to see the sun rise from the van­tage point of the 4,000-year-old solar monument.

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The sum­mer sol­stice is also a time of cel­e­bra­tion for Chris­tians and Pagans. In Chris­tian­ity, the first day of sum­mer marks the fes­ti­val of St. John the Bap­tist, and in Pagan­ism fol­low­ers cel­e­brate what they call “mid­sum­mer” with bon­fires and feasts.

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Happy Sol­stice to all, and to all a good day!

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